Would You Like To Take A Survey?

Well, this week has been a disaster. A morass of epic (mor)assy proportions. No one died or anything. It’s not that tragic. But it was pretty bad. The one bright light is that I may break my rules soon. Why, you ask? Why would I dare to break the rule that is specifically designed to keep me from getting fired? Because I might get fired anyway. Before you ask, no. It has nothing to do with this blog. Actually, I’m convinced it has nothing to do with reality. Basically, what it comes down to is a giant misunderstanding salad with a healthy dose of megalomania sauce and a side of crazycakes. With an arsenic chaser. But, since I still have the job (for the moment), I will maintain my rule and end this topic here.

Instead, I would like to talk about you. Whoever you are. I know I’ve had a person or two stopping by these days, with a couple of regulars beginning their Bagely habit (that’s how I’ve decided to refer to this site: my Bagely habit). So, now that I have a few readers, I’d like to know more about them, er… you.

I have developed this handy quiz-like questionnaire to find out more about you. Pick a question or two (or all of them, I’m not strict) and answer them in the comments. For every question you answer, you may ask me one in return (or two or three, I’m not strict). The only questions I won’t answer are ones that will break the rules. Other than that, I’m fair game. I’ll answer them all in a post in a few days, when the traffic has been enough that I might have a question to answer. Anyway, here we go!

1.      If you could have one profession in the whole world (and not have to acquire the training, but just know how to do it from day one), what would it be?

2.      Name two things that you would change about your life, if you could snap your fingers and it would be done.

3.      Name two things that you would never change about your life.

4.      Given the choice between fruits or vegetables (like at a buffet that has only fruits and vegetables), which do you choose?

5.      If a train leaves Denver at 1:42 pm heading east at 55 mph and another train leaves St. Louis at 4:05 pm heading west at 62 mph, what time do they meet? Wait, what? Sorry… Let me try again:  You’re on a train leaving either Denver or St. Louis headed south and let’s assume this train will make any stop you want all the way down to the tip of Argentina (forget about the canal, okay?). Where do you decide to get off?

6.      What is the middle name of your firstborn child (hypothetical future child and/or live child tugging at your pant leg this very second)?

7.      What is your favorite band? Disclaimer: This may or may not be my lazy attempt to get you to broaden my horizons.

8.      If you weren’t allowed to live in the US (or your current country), where would you live?

9.      Which do you say: Pop or soda? Turn signals or blinkers or directionals? Fall or autumn? Aunt (ont) or Aunt (ant)? Tennis shoes or sneakers? Sofa or couch? Bathroom or restroom? (And any other colloquialisms you can thing of…)

10.  You unexpectedly have four days off from work (and/or are child-free) in the middle of the week. What do you do with yourself?

11.  Which do you prefer: Miracle whip or mayo? Pepsi or Coke? Mac or PC? McDonald’s or Burger King? Coffee or tea? Toilet paper: over or under? Law & Order or CSI? Toothpaste: from the end or from the middle? Sleep with socks or sleep without socks? Ballpoint or felt-tip? (And any other black and white issues you can think of…)

12. You’re stuck in traffic without your phone or a book and the radio is broken. You have only your mind to entertain yourself. You’re not in a huge rush to get anywhere, so you’re not stressed or frustrated. What is your “go to” mental entertainment?

13.  For most gifty occasions, you give:

a.       A thoughtful item you purchased

b.      Something homemade

c.       Money or gift card

d.      A well-written note or card

e.      “Oh, crap! It’s your birthday? Again? Here: I got you this… pencil.”

14.  What’s one thing you wish someone had said to you when you were younger?

15.  You’re at work and drank a 20oz latte and a Diet Pepsi and a gallon of water before lunch.  You’ve never had to pee so badly in your life, but the bathroom is full. The opposite gender bathroom is empty. Do you risk it?

Again, answer as many as you like. Then ask me questions. Because then I don’t have to agonize about what to write in my already agonizing week. And you get to know things about me. So it’s like everybody wins. Except maybe not you. Because I’m not sure my answers will be all that interesting. Let’s find out, shall we?