Has anyone SEEN my list, by the way? It's a piece of paper and it says, "Ross" on it...

Now that Thanksgiving has passed and people have celebrated their gratitude by getting into fights at WalMart, the Christmas season is apparently upon us. And every year, around this time, Mom asks me very nicely for a Christmas list. And I tell her I will give it to her. Days and/or weeks later, she kindly reminds me again. I make a mental note to send her one, but I write it on some kind of off-brand mental post-it note that has really poor sticking quality. In order to avoid that frustration this year, I've decided to put it right here on the blog, since she reads it every day.

Elise's Christmas List 2011:

          1. One husband. Of the Christian variety, 6'2" or larger. Preferably with a steady income source and the ability to string together more than six words at a time.

          2. One baby. With a layaway option on 3 more over the next 8-10 years (like a savings bond). Please keep in mind that #1 is a prerequisite.

          3. One job. Preferably one that allows me to work from home and/or one without substantial mental and spiritual trauma.

          4. One last phone call to Nana.

          5. One teleportation device with portals near Roommate, Big Brother(and therefore Sister-In-Law and Niece), and the North Shore of Oahu, Hawaii.

          6. One hundred pairs of yoga pants, black.

          7. One license to wear yoga pants in public without shame or mockery.

          8. One rear end that looks good in yoga pants.

          9. One Magic Digestive System that only absorbs the amount of calories necessary for the day and ignores the rest.

         10. Umm.... Oh yeah! That World Peace thingy. Because, why not?

I'm not sure which stores carry these items (except for #6--Target has TALL yoga pants), but see what you can do. Otherwise, I'd really like Sims 3 Pets. It's up to you, really. Whichever....

[I apologize for the obscure FRIENDS quote as the title of today's post. It's mostly for Sister. And a little bit for Temerity Jane. So if you didn't get it, just ignore it. Or go watch FRIENDS. Your life will be more complete if you do...]

1 comment:

  1. It's not obscure at all! Friends references are awesome.